Ethan's Daughter Page 9
“Fine. The inspector said if I’m not willing to press charges and Anna has disappeared, there’s nothing the police can do.”
“That’s it?”
“That’s the situation now, so leave it be.”
She relaxed her shoulders in relief. “Fine. Good. Then we have nothing else to say to one another.”
“Right.”
“Okay, then.”
“Good.”
The insane urge to laugh bubbled in Leah’s throat, just as a smile played at his mouth.
He had to be the hardest man to stay mad at when he flashed his very rare, very beautiful smile. She grinned. “Do you want to grab a coffee?”
He raised his eyebrows. “Is that a truce?”
She shrugged. “Might be.”
He fully smiled and her attraction to him bloomed once more.
“Okay, then. Coffee. Lead the way.” He gestured behind her with a wave. “I’m sure Marian’s will stretch to a croissant, too, if you’re hungry.”
Leah was pleasantly surprised when his fingers touched the base of her spine...and then horribly disappointed when he whipped them away as though her denim jacket had scalded him.
“So...” He took in a heavy breath. “The stitches in my hand feel kind of tight this morning. I assume that’s a good thing?”
Not the subtlest change of subject, but still... She focused ahead. “It’s only been a few days, but it’s a sign the wound is healing well. I’ll take a look tomorrow and we might see about snipping the stitches.”
“Great.”
They lapsed into silence, and Leah walked a little faster toward Marian’s, wanting the buffer of a bustling crowd around them. Sunday or no Sunday, Marian’s bakery was never quiet, and despite knowing he’d no doubt bite her head off a second time, she really wanted to know just how much he’d told Cat Garrett. She cleared her throat. “Where’s Daisy this morning?”
“At my mum’s. She lives in Clandown.”
“Really? That’s fairly close by.” Leah glanced at him, curious about who he was before his wife left him. “Why didn’t you choose to stay closer to your mum, so she could help out when Anna left? Why Templeton?”
He shrugged. “I wanted to raise Daisy the best I could alone, and the Cove felt like the right place to do it.”
“Leaning on family isn’t something to be ashamed of, you know.” She glanced at him again. “I would think every parent needs a support system.”
“Maybe.”
The listlessness in his voice made her falter, but she walked on, pulling her lips tightly together to trap any more questions inside. Why did he feel he had to do everything for Daisy alone? What was it that had him thinking and feeling that way?
“Leah?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Can we stop a second?”
She faced him. “You okay?”
Concern darkened his usually bright eyes. “You do believe I’m doing my best by Daisy, right? Anna turning up here, the knife, the pictures...nothing like that has happened before. On the whole, do you think Daisy’s happy?”
“Of course.”
“She’s been my only concern for the last five years. My work comes second to her, my life and happiness third.”
Leah frowned. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Because it matters what you think of me.”
She held fast to her intellect rather than the funny feeling whipping around her heart. “Why?”
He stared into her eyes. “I don’t know. I haven’t figured it out yet.”
Her heart stumbled. He was looking at her in a gentle, quizzical way, as though she were a beautiful puzzle he couldn’t quite solve. She smiled softly. “Well, what you think of me matters to me, too. I haven’t figured out why, either. Yet.”
His gaze lingered on her lips before he snapped his attention to the street ahead, his shoulders relaxing. “Let’s grab those coffees.”
A comfortable silence stretched between them, punctuated by passing traffic and people venturing out for a walk along the seafront on the promise of a fine, if chilly, day. Pulling her jacket tighter around her, Leah fought off the temptation to ease her hand into his by stuffing her hands into the front pockets of her white skinny jeans.
A chasm of uncertainty still stretched between them and she longed to know what he thought at that moment. He liked her. She was pretty sure about that, but still a deep sadness shadowed his gaze whenever he looked at her. He kept a careful distance, defined by his need to prove above all else how much he loved his daughter.
She didn’t need him to prove anything. His love for Daisy emanated from him. Maybe it was her? The way she spoke to and questioned him? Was she being presumptuous about his struggles because of how easily she managed to comfort kids and their parents at the emergency room? She’d spent nowhere near the hours Ethan had with Daisy. He was a parent. She was a nurse.
Was she prying?
He was a private man used to living and working alone, day after day. Their lives couldn’t be more different.
Uncertainty had fully taken hold by the time they reached the bakery.
Ethan pushed open the door and extended his hand, inviting her to enter ahead of him. She stepped inside and immediately breathed in the familiar and comforting scents of freshly baked bread, cinnamon and a heavenly blend of sugar and jam. She sighed. “God bless the bakery.”
“Well, thank you, sweetheart.” Marian laughed from the table she was clearing nearby. “You want some coffee?”
Leah smiled. “Hi, Marian. That would be great, thank you.”
The woman beamed and tipped her head back to look at Ethan. “Well, Mr. James, a pleasure as always. What are you doing in here with Miss Dixon? I’m used to you meandering in on your own and then sitting in a corner, pretending not to notice the whole world going on around you.”
Biting back her smile, Leah crossed her arms and looked at Ethan. His gaze was soft on Marian’s...softer than it ever was when he looked at her. He raised his eyebrows. “You know I’m pretending?”
“Of course. I read your books and I’m pretty certain the sexy, trashy-mouthed, irresistible heroines with size-DD boobies and nonexistent waists are based on yours truly.”
He smiled, his eyes glinting with laughter. “How could they be based on anyone else? Look at you.”
She boomed a laugh and swatted him playfully on the arm, her ample bosom jiggling. “Damn cheeky boy. And to think people assume you’re a loner.” She shook her head as she headed to the counter. “I know differently.”
Leah raised her eyebrows when he turned to look at her, his smile dissolving. “What?”
“Is that show of humor strictly reserved for Marian? Or are you going to start lightening up around me, too?”
“That’s something I’m finding very hard to do.” He brushed past her and headed for a booth. “Shall we sit down?”
She hesitated before taking a deep breath and following him. The more time she spent with him, the more he confused and attracted her in equal measure. Yet, deep in her heart, she sensed if she pushed for more than friendship, that would be a surefire way to send him running in the opposite direction.
* * *
ETHAN LIFTED HIS espresso to his mouth, surreptitiously watching Leah as she stared across the bakery. Nothing about what he had to say to her filled him with satisfaction, but his next words were necessary. He needed to make it clear he wasn’t ready, wasn’t entirely sure he ever would be, for a relationship. There was every chance she’d deem him arrogant just for going there, but he was usually pretty sensitive to any undercurrent of feeling, and right now, lust burned deep inside him and it had to stop.
His increasing desire to touch and kiss her was dangerous enough, but the flicker in his chest whe
never she smiled at him felt damn near fatal. He had to protect himself...protect Daisy.
After all, he knew only too well the consequences of letting down his family, let alone a woman he felt he could really come to like...a lot.
If his decisions affected just him, he might have been inclined to romance Leah, ask her out, buy her flowers, the whole thing. But his decisions affected Daisy, too, and she was already becoming far too fond of Leah, far too quickly. Somewhere down the line, his baby girl could be hurt if Leah walked away.
Maybe his fears were totally irrational. She certainly gave the impression she’d stand by anyone through anything if she cared for them, but the risk that she might give up on him—on Daisy—one day was too great. Yes, he and his daughter were sometimes lonely, but surely that was a consequence better than heartbreak.
Anna might have left five years ago, but maybe he and Daisy needed another five years before they were safe enough to take the leap. Who knew? But now was definitely not the right time for Leah to hold their hearts in her hands.
He lowered his cup to its saucer and the clack of porcelain turned her head. “You okay?”
“Sure.” He leaned his forearms on the table. “We need to talk.”
Concern flitted in her big hazel eyes before she mirrored his posture and leaned forward. “Go ahead.”
He took a deep breath, slowly released it. “I might be way out of line here, but I need you to know nothing can happen between us. Romantically, I mean. Daisy’s happiness comes first and she likes you. Probably too much. If we get into anything and you end up walking away...well, I can’t let that happen.”
Leah frowned and her gaze clouded with annoyance. “And which part can’t you allow, Ethan? Me walking away? Or the letting Daisy like me too much?”
He stiffened, no longer confident that being straight with her was the best way forward. “What?”
“You said ‘and you end up walking away.’ Is that what you really won’t allow to happen? Or is it because I make your daughter smile and laugh and that scares you? Or for the first time in years, you might just feel something for a woman? For me? Could this actually be more about you than Daisy?”
His confusion cleared and irritation rose. “So, you do think me a crappy parent.”
“Not at all.”
“You practically accuse me of putting myself before Daisy again, yet—”
“No. That’s all on you. For the record, I consider you a great parent. I’m not a mum, so maybe you’ll think me out of line, but I also think you have what protecting a child is about completely wrong. Protecting your child is when something could physically hurt them, or you can see something they might say or do could have a really bad, detrimental effect. Banning your son or daughter from spending time with every person they enjoy being with, whom they might grow to love, surely can’t be protecting them? It must be something far, far worse because they will never experience happiness, security and being looked after by anyone other than you. Is that who you are, Ethan?”
If tears hadn’t been glinting in her eyes, if her lips hadn’t tightened on her final word as though she fought not to say more, he might have gotten angry. As it was, no anger came, only shame. He closed his eyes and dropped back against the seat.
“You have to let her live, Ethan. Anything else is unfair. My parents tried so hard to protect me over the years. Probably too much, when they took my grandmother away from me. Do you want to end up having the strained relationship with Daisy that I have with my mum and dad?”
He slowly opened his eyes and stared at her hand as she eased it atop his. He shook his head. “I have to protect her.”
Sympathy seeped into Leah’s gaze. “I know, but keeping her locked up between your house and school is not protecting her.” A tear rolled over her cheek and she lifted her hand from his to brush it away. “By keeping me from my grandmother, my parents nearly destroyed me. Don’t take potential love from Daisy’s life, Ethan. Let it in. Please.”
Nerves jumped inside his stomach and his heart picked up speed. “I can’t.”
“Yes, you can.”
His eyes burned. “You didn’t see her when Anna disappeared. You didn’t see the nights Daisy couldn’t sleep, the days she cried at the front door to go and find her mummy. You didn’t see her curl up in my lap and tremble, or watch her look at every young, dark-haired woman she saw on the street with such hope.”
Leah closed her eyes. “Oh, Ethan.”
Pain slashed through his chest and he abruptly stood. “I’d better go. I’ll see you around.”
“Just stop.”
He glared at her, frustration over the things he wanted and could never have storming through him. “I can’t. Don’t you understand I have to be this way for Daisy to never be hurt again? Now with the mess Anna is in—”
“Anna is nothing more than a new excuse.”
“What?”
She glared. “You were clearly like this with Daisy before Anna made her recent reappearance. Stop lying to yourself. Stop lying to me.” Her shoulders dropped and her gaze softened. “Look, the last thing I want is to fight with you. Why don’t you come over and we’ll play a board game or something? I’ll make us dinner. Let her have some fun. Nothing has to happen between us, but surely I can be yours and Daisy’s friend. See how that fits. What do you say?”
Indecision and fear battled inside him. “Just friends?”
“Just friends.”
He stared deep into her eyes, the chatter and laughter all around them seeming to dissolve until there was just her. Just Leah. He blew out a defeated breath. Who was he kidding? He wanted to spend time with her. He wanted Daisy to spend time with her, but still the fear lingered. Still... “Fine. Dinner. A board game.”
She smiled, her beautiful eyes brightening. “Great. Six thirty at my place. Don’t be late.”
He nodded and stepped toward the door, his heart racing like a freight train.
CHAPTER NINE
LEAH CAST HER gaze over her living-cum-dining room and satisfaction wound through her. She’d kept the small mahogany dining table free of decoration, except for three lace-patterned place mats and a small vase of pink tulips in the center. The cutlery was a little mismatched, as would the plates be when she served up her special lasagna and homemade cheesy garlic bread. A sense of mischief had been tumbling around inside her all day.
Ethan’s huge cabin was so regimented, she wanted him and Daisy to see just how chaotically a person could live without the world ending.
Tonight would be fun all the way, even if she had to drag Ethan kicking and screaming into her planned mania.
The doorbell rang and she hurried into the hallway, pausing at the wall mirror to check her teeth for lipstick and her eyes for smudged mascara. All clear. She shook her head so her bangs fell lightly over her brow, her silver earrings swinging.
She breathed deep, pushed up her glasses and strode to the door. Pulling it open, she smiled. “Welcome.”
Ethan stared at her in open astonishment, his gaze lingering on hers before he did a sweep of her entire body, from her high heels to the neckline of her dress. Heat rode a wave through every inch he inspected.
She snapped her gaze to Daisy. “Hello, sweetheart. You look beautiful.”
“Thank you.” She thrust some daisies wrapped in green tissue paper and twine toward Leah. “These are for you. They’re my favorites because they have the same name as me.”
As her heart melted, Leah struggled to keep her smile in place, while Ethan’s stare continued to bore into her. “And they’re beautiful, just like you. Come on in. I’ve set some games out on the table in the living room. Why don’t you choose one for us to play after dinner?”
Daisy grinned and sped past her into the living room. Leah met Ethan’s steady gaze. “Hi.”r />
He smiled softly. “Hi. You look amazing.”
“Thank you.” Her cheeks heated. “You don’t look too bad yourself.”
“If I’d known, I would’ve put on something a bit fancier than jeans and a shirt.”
She laughed. “I don’t think me wearing a dress warrants a tux. You’ll do. Come on in. I hope you’re hungry.”
With her legs unexpectedly trembling, Leah led the way into her kitchen. The man smelled unbelievable. All strong, warm and ridiculously sexy. She walked to the sink and grabbed a vase from one of her cupboards, glad for something to do with her hands.
Somehow, Ethan had again managed to turn her from sensible nurse Leah into horny, lust-riddled Leah.
She swallowed. Thankfully, there was a gorgeous seven-year-old little girl next door to keep the situation in check.
“So...” She grabbed some scissors from a pot on the windowsill and set about arranging the daisies. “Did you do anything nice this afternoon?”
“You mean before or after I collected Daisy from my mum’s?”
“Either.”
“Well, because I dropped off Daisy on such short notice, Mum drilled me with questions about where I’d been. I managed to convince her I had a lunch date. It was a darn sight easier to deal with her curiosity about a new woman than with her freaking out if I had told her Anna made an appearance.”
“I understand that. Letting the police know is one thing, but upsetting your mum without good reason is something else altogether.” Leah carried the flowers to her small bistro table in the corner. “These look lovely. Thank you.”
“I’d like to take the credit, but Daisy chose them.”
“Well, they’re beautiful. Wine?”
“Great.”
Leah walked to the counter and poured them each a glass of merlot before handing him one. When he curled his fingers around hers, she froze.
He stared down at her, his gaze gentle. “You look beautiful, Leah. Really beautiful.”
What did she say? He’d made it perfectly clear he didn’t want a relationship, but the soft hunger in his gaze indicated the complete opposite. She smiled and slowly drew her fingers from beneath his. “Thank you.”